whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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