I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
