i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
