There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
