I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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