I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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