On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Randomize
