just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I have tasted many bathrooms
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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