After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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