I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
