Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Randomize
