He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
