By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
Randomize
