I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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