where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize