he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
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