Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
no, he came in my armpit
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize
