What did we do last night that was yellow?
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
