i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
