If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
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