you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
