There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
