I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize