its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
