I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize