i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
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