I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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