party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
