my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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