I cockslap morals
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
