hotel room ftw
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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