Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Randomize
