I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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