Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Just invented taco cereal.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
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