She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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