I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
