Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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