I'm drive I can fine osifer
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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