Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Dear god my vagina.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
