Please don't use social media to get back at me.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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