What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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