belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Randomize
