I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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