? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
