Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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