some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
