i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
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