It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Randomize
