and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
he fucked my hip out of place.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize