Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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