turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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