She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize